Column: You better stop this Greyhound Bus

If you ever want to be extremely uncomfortable on a long trip, I highly recommend riding a Greyhound Bus.

A few years back, I was able to take a few trips on a Greyhound, and it is something I still think of a lot – and not fondly. On one occasion, I was sitting on a bus at the station in Las Vegas, and an entire K-9 crew showed up and stormed down the aisles. It was something straight out of a television show, and I wouldn’t say I liked it at all.

There was another time I met some “travelers” from Australia who gave me a big scoop of Vegemite on a cracker, and the taste of that atrocity still haunts me.

The most memorable experience I had on a Greyhound was booking a trip from my hometown in Rock Springs, Wyoming, to Laramie, Wyoming. While it was only a three-hour trip, I didn’t have a car then, so this seemed like a cheap way to spend time with friends and attend a University of Wyoming football game.

As I boarded the bus in the early afternoon, I showed the captain my ticket, and he told me that he would not be stopping in Laramie. I told him my ticket said to get on this same bus, and I would be taken to Laramie. He started mumbling and said something to the effect that I could get on the bus, but he still wouldn’t be stopping in Laramie.

I don’t know if it was because I was young and naïve, but I seriously thought he was kidding. My ticket said I would be dropped off in Laramie, so I thought there was no way he could disregard a purchased ticket.

We stopped an hour and a half later in Rawlins, Wyoming, and as we got back on the bus, he told me that we would not be stopping until Cheyenne. At this point, I was frantic, and I was not quite sure what to do.

As we started moving down Interstate 80 again, I begged and pleaded with him that my ticket said this bus would take me to Laramie. He would not listen and began to get very angry.

I was not thrilled with the idea of calling a friend from a pay phone and having them drive to Cheyenne to come and get me. This was before everyone had cell phones, so there was no way I could get a hold of Greyhound so they could tell this lunatic to drop me off.

I thought what he was doing was illegal, but he didn’t seem to have a care in the world.

As we approached Laramie, I decided I would not go down without a fight.

I was sitting a few rows behind him, so about 10 miles away, I told him to make sure to stop in Laramie. It could have been anywhere at this point; I did not care.

He once again said, this time in a harsh tone there was no way he would be stopping.

I knew I needed to get his attention. Just about as loud as I could, I told him, “You are going to stop this ****** in Laramie to drop me off just like my ******** ticket says you will.”

The whole bus instantly became quiet. This included the driver, who did not utter a word. He pulled the bus over about a ¼ mile from the first exit to Laramie. When he followed me outside, I thought he would want to fight, but he didn’t say a word as he opened the door so I could grab my bag.

It was odd to walk along the side of the road to the truck stop, but I had made it to Laramie.

I called a friend and had them pick me up, and it became a great trip.

On my return trip, a different driver had no problem stopping in Rock Springs.

The friend who promised to pick me up did not show up. And my parents were out of town. It was late, and I didn’t want to bother anyone, so I walked about five miles home with my suitcase.

I think it is safe to say I will not return to ride on Greyhound.